something [*] is about to happen

* - not necessarily beautiful. but maybe. it is spring in new york, and soon to be summer, when i most come alive, and the city will come alive after a long hibernation, perhaps. maybe maybe maybe.

March was all the things I said it would be -

an experiment in cohabitation with PartnerBeast, the data is gathered and we will not be doing that long-term at this point. i am maybe still recovering from it emotionally, synthesizing what i've learned about myself, my concepts of home, and my relationships.

some strange virtual reunions in early march. not sure what to make of growing and changing away from what i'd started from. glad for it, but also disorienting to look backwards.

harriet having really tough family stuff going on. only so much i can do from afar, but we continue to overall be good for each other. i went excessive with white day gifts, totally worth it though.

more blaseball, and the development of my next big twine project, a reference desk of a kind, whichtool. pretty proud of this strange helpful thing existing.

//

and then April -

Disco Elysium: Final Cut came out March 30, most of the way through a blaseball "off season", and also I got sick (standard head cold) right around then, so I played an entire 40 hour run in uh, a week. still such an incredible game, and coming back to it mostly-fresh was wonderful.

partnerbeast had some apartment struggles that were incredibly emotionally exhausting to deal with. but we're making it through. it was also his birthday at the end of the month, which i think i helped make pretty damn good, collaborating on a huge gift, etc. he's working on some cool personal projects, as well. we've been dating five years now! that's wild.

the city slowly starts to reopen. we're going back to once a week in the office starting the week of may 17. i am...anxious but excited? i want the change of pace, i will miss the flexibility, i am deeply deeply privileged compared to my colleagues on things like "not having to worry about childcare" and "not being afraid to be on public transit". i am slowly training myself to wake up earlier again. we will see what the future holds.

harriet and i continue as we do. canada's vaccine rollout is A Problem. further family stress and work stress and health blargh on her side, but i do what i can for her. we had a good double date with friends, and tend to our communities and mutual friendships, we make space for intimacy as best we can, and persist and persist and persist.

///

and trying these notes in another format:
weekends -
mar 6-7: getting the second vaccine, mostly
mar 13-14 (Library): friday night with [-----] in williamsburg - bushwick country club, noods n chill, freehold observing others drinking out of disco balls. david's brisket, i think? i literally don't remember which is kinda disconcerting
mar 20-21: first benfaremo of the year, and assorted other jackson heights-ish wanderings.
mar 27-28 (Library): brooklyn botanical gardens, hinterlands. dinner with the beastparents, fancy Korean (her name is han).
apr 3-4: sick.
apr 10-11: solo weekend, now more intentional - sunnyside, soto la stelle for fancy pizza, thrifting.
apr 17-18: soho art galleries, chinatown and financial district. sunday solo.
apr 24-25: red hook somtum der, bars, piers, and ice cream. fixing things, allan's delivers currant rolls.
may 1-2: mmuseumm, wok wok, chinatown ice cream factory, *shoreline* jersey city, ani ramen with [redacted], pint. prospect park, ballfields red hook, ikea (failed search for blahaj.)

///

again, may brings the return to the office, and possibly something about the strange opportunity that i brought up back in january. (maybe. who knows.) possibly planning for harriet's next visit? and roguelike celebration prep will get more intense from here, with the CFP being published soon.

i'm tired a lot, lately. my skin has enjoyed complaining a lot, some of which is probably my own damn fault, but still, unpleasant. i really need to get around to doing all the health stuff i punted during quarantine, but also my health insurance is currently kind of annoying about specialists and i can't fix that until october. bluh.

beyond usual blaseball blathering, i picked up the new pokemon snap game, which i am not great at but is cute and fun.

///

may 8-9: possibly yet another art gallery, chelsea this time. it's mothers day but i do not think i will hang with beastmom, i think i need a break.
may 15-16: ??? i think we are hoping to release the celebration cfp sometime around here
may 22-23: close to harriet's birthday but distance is what it is. nevertheless.
may 29-31 (memorial day): the beasts have invited me for fancy sushi in new jersey, but otherwise no real plans.